The other day we (Court, DB and I) went on a field trip. One of the destinations was the mall. Ah the mall. It’s bright, cheery, and utterly depressing. I know why I don’t spend more time there. I was on a calendar mission, and Mission Accomplished! This year on the back of the front door…(segue: now is it the back if it’s on the inside of the apartment? I know your apartment is on the other side of the front door…or “behind” the front door…but would your dwelling then also be in front of the back door? Is it to the side of the side door? I guess it’s “inside” the side door… But regardless…if the whole of your dwelling is INSIDE, then why are you behind? No. No drugs today. Maybe that’s the problem.) we have PENGUINS! Last year was Pandas. We also have a lovely MAC baby calendar (Hawaiian bab(e)y Miles)in the kitchen so there’s no forgetting what day it is in 2 parts of the house. Stellar.
Where was I? The mall. Yes, the mall. People are RUDE at the mall!! It’s like I am the neighbor’s dog sniffing around on the MP (that’s Mall People) property and they are just WAITING for me to take a dump on their lawn so they can have a valid reason for severely disliking me. Walking down the inside of the mall, Courtland later confided in me, scared the crud out of him because he was pretty sure I was going to take a shopping bag or a shoulder to the face. I also have a history of getting really excited when I see things I like, and evidently don’t pick up my feet and frequently trip, and there was that one incident in the game store a few Christmases ago…
So he had valid concerns. This came up when I was talking about getting out of his hair and driving over to see maybe my dad or something. Court said the risks were too high. I thought he meant I was a crap driver (and he may mean that), but ultimately what he was saying is that if I were to get in any sort of an accident, the chances of my chin being involved and the inevitable catastrophic negative impact on my healing that would ensue is not worth the risk.
I am now bribing Court for a walk to Jamba Juice. Of course i will not benefit from this trip whatsoever.
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